This has been bugging me since 6:30 am this morning. I had to work at 4 am. Since the store was closed and we were working as a team, we took our 6:30 am break together. Someone had a televised sermon on the break room tv. I didn't mind. The preacher had a nice voice (you know, one of those soothing preacher voices) and it was a good message (make your own path, don't let others dictate how you live). It made me think of church, which made me think of how we don't attend church, which made me think of how every Sunday the boy gets disappointed when none of his friends are home to play because they're all at church.
I mentioned this out loud. The coworker sitting next to me said, "You don't go to church??" Strangely, because I would never imagine she would be the church-going type, her voice seemed all judge-y to me.
"No, we don't."
The conversation ended at that and moved on to work related things. I mentioned that I wish I could just once catch someone stealing something (every shift I find oodles of ripped open packages, hidden among other items). The judge-y coworker asked me why.
"Because I would like to punch them in the throat." I responded very matter-of-fact.
"Whoa, that bothers you?" Was her response.
"Yeah, it enrages me."
"Really?"
"Yes, really. I HATE thieves."
At one point she kind of chuckled and stated something along the lines of, "I'm pretty sure we've all done it."
Um, no. I'm pretty sure we haven't all done it. Well, honestly, I think I remember stealing a lighter when I was about 12 to smoke a cigarette that a friend had stolen. But I don't remember feeling good about it and I never did it again.
Anyway, I can't get this out of my head. She's surprised and judge-y about me not going to church but thinks stealing is ok and shouldn't bother me? WTF is wrong with that picture? Does anyone else think that is crazy?
I'm a perfectionist with clutter issues, who may or may not have ADD and just a touch of OCD. This is my journey to find myself amongst the clutter (and maybe some peace for my family along the way). I'd write in a paper journal, but I can't find my pen.
I have wondered about this very thing with my in laws who are devout Catholics. They judge my husband and I because we aren't married by church. We got married a week before he shipped off to Korea for a year....yet almost all of them aren't married by church or by court house. I honestly think that God was with us that day and understands our circumstances. I have considered writing into the pope to get our marriage recognized by the church but then think why? I am doing that only because my in laws want me to? Those people who think its ok to lie to the state and receive welfare or its acceptable to cheat and have another family on the side or sell drugs? Why should I try to please that family when I myself already know God understands. I have always thought how unfair it is for these people to judge us when they themselves aren't perfect. But I unfortunately have also come to learn that they feel because they go to church one day a week they are forgiven and go back doing the same things that I feel are unacceptable week after week. This is where I just say to each is their own. I don't agree with what they do but I try not to judge even if they may be staring at me as I receive the host on the occasional church Sunday.
ReplyDeleteI have wondered about this very thing with my in laws who are devout Catholics. They judge my husband and I because we aren't married by church. We got married a week before he shipped off to Korea for a year....yet almost all of them aren't married by church or by court house. I honestly think that God was with us that day and understands our circumstances. I have considered writing into the pope to get our marriage recognized by the church but then think why? I am doing that only because my in laws want me to? Those people who think its ok to lie to the state and receive welfare or its acceptable to cheat and have another family on the side or sell drugs? Why should I try to please that family when I myself already know God understands. I have always thought how unfair it is for these people to judge us when they themselves aren't perfect. But I unfortunately have also come to learn that they feel because they go to church one day a week they are forgiven and go back doing the same things that I feel are unacceptable week after week. This is where I just say to each is their own. I don't agree with what they do but I try not to judge even if they may be staring at me as I receive the host on the occasional church Sunday.
ReplyDeleteI agree that it is crazy. Merely going to church can't be your saving grace. You have to live the life too.
ReplyDeleteExactly Heather!
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